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Friday, August 22, 2014

Needs, Wants and Coloring.

What do you want?


No, really. At your core. At your deepest level. Can you even form a clear thought around it? If you come up with an answer quickly, are you sure that it's true? Is that desire a result of what you have thought that you should want for so long that you don't even know any longer, or do you know what you want yet live in fear of what that could mean or what you would risk for it?

Are you uncomfortable? Good. That means this is something that you need to face, embrace and get comfortable with the discomfort so that you can actually get what you want. 

So, what do you want? I've been thinking and talking a lot lately about Anthony Robbins 6 human needs. And yes, there is a difference between need and want. But what you want is a symptom usually of something deeper that you need. Here is the list. 

The Six Human Needs

1. Certainty: assurance you can avoid pain and gain pleasure
2. Uncertainty/Variety: the need for the unknown, change, new stimuli
3. Significance: feeling unique, important, special or needed
4. Connection/Love: a strong feeling of closeness or union with someone or something
5. Growth: an expansion of capacity, capability or understanding
6. Contribution: a sense of service and focus on helping, giving to and supporting others

Basically, he says that we all have these 6 needs, but that most of us focus on one or two in our lives at any given moment. Probably for years at a time. Some of us get stuck in one or two for our entire lives. 

Certainty is a big one for people who like to feel safe. Comfortable. Everything is status quo. Uncertainty is one for those thrill seekers, always needing to be on the edge. Two sides of a coin. An interesting dynamic, for me, because for the longest time these have been my top two. I always craved safety and comfort while a lot of my true nature needs variety and change. Now, I can absolutely say that my top need has become growth and the contribution part of my life has been growing and will continue to blossom. 

Anthony says that to be truly fulfilled, we need to bring more of those last two into our focus. I truly believe that, as well. If you're not growing, you're dying. If you're not contributing...to something, you start to feel like you have no worth. I know, at one point or another I've been in both of these places. And I've spoken to people lately as a life coach and many people use the words useless or no purpose. Which is obviously not true. These are just stories we tell ourselves and then the stories take over our true selves. Bust out of the story.

But really all of these are needs that need to be met on some level. It's good to look at what need you are really filling in your life and if that is really FULfilling you. 

Back to what you want. Here's an idea. Sit down and write out your vision for your most fabulous life. Make it big, big, big. And then...take little steps towards that. If you give up on it...what do you think will happen. Okay, maybe you made it too big and what could be the consequence? That you don't get all of it and only a lot of it? So many of us waste our time and valuable life experiences by saying that we could never or it's just not meant to be. 

I want to start creating. No, scratch that. I want to continue to create (because we have created our current realities as well) but with even more faith, love, hope, joy and awareness than before. I want to use reds and purples, yellows and greens, bright and beautiful passionate colors with some nice resting colors in there as well because rest is necessary and feels so good. 

And see, what a beautiful world this is. 



Link to Tony Robbins page below.

http://training.tonyrobbins.com/the-6-human-needs-why-we-do-what-we-do/

Day 12, #justwrite #writeeverydamnday #writingchallenge #writeordie

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