sweetest thing

You remind me... (Mary said that in the 90's). 

But you do remind me. Of high school. Of magical nights, football games, possibilities. Remember the days when you first learned about falling in love? And you wanted to make out with your person... all the time...but also had that sweet desire to protect them, hold them safe in a space away from all the rest? They seemed to inhabit their own planet. Really, so sweet. 

You want to do all the things with them. The naked, breathless, alive things. To learn those things with them. But you also want to be at the party amongst all the people that you know, or don't, and have that moment where they grab your hand and...everything else melts away but that connection. That moment. Because what you have is special. That can't be had with just anybody. It can't. 

But THAT exists. 

To find that and show up for it. To keep showing up for it. To honor it and let the meaningless drop away.

One day I will find this again...I will. 

And if not, I suppose I will just write about it. Create a world in black and white where I can navigate with less heartbreak. 

But let's be honest. The heartbreak is worth it if you've been brave enough to truly love. Even with heartbreak, the love is always a gift.